Accio Blog! Post-Harry Potter Mania Check-In

I like being busy. I feel like I have more purpose, I get things done, and I (usually) have a good time. But suddenly it’s nearing the end of July and I realize I haven’t blogged for two weeks!

But I have an excuse!

That’s right, I’ve been busy with Harry Potter-mania! Well, and my friend Nicole visiting from California. Mostly Nicole visiting. But Harry Potter, too! Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part II came out last Friday and we were there on Thursday night to see it when the clock struck midnight!

Why, yes, we are adults. Why do you ask?

Look, we don’t actually dress up, we just get into the spirit! We tried to make shirts, but had a T-shirt transfer failure. Apparently you’re supposed to put a towel over the shirt before you iron it. Who knew? Anyone who read the directions, sure, but how were we supposed to know? We had to settle for scarves, pins, and horcruxes. We also got sweet Harry Potter 3D glasses! We were bummed about our shirt fail though. We made awesome shirts for the Order of the Phoenix premiere back in 2007.

Pictured: 3 Levels of Awesome

I started reading the books right before the Order of the Phoenix film came out and it changed my life for the better. If you don’t get it, or you’re sick of hearing about it on Facebook and Twitter,  it’s because you haven’t given it a chance. Truly great epic stories are hard to come by, and living through the hype is one of the most fun parts. I don’t think a story or franchise this big (and amazing) will happen again in my lifetime. I’m forever grateful that Nicole talked me into reading the books. There’s something really special about the whole thing and I actually feel sorry for people who don’t give it a chance.

Fuck, I love Harry Potter.

Anyway.

I loved the movie and had an absolute blast anticipating it beforehand and making my Facebook statuses Harry Potter quotes for the two weeks before the movie premiere. I’m sure I got defriended by more than a few people for it, but I also brought joy into the hearts of my fellow fans, like Summer. She and I were throwing them out left and right! It was so much fun! And really, when’s the last time you saw a really fascinating Facebook status update?

Side Soapbox: I love how people act like they’re so incredibly inconvenienced by people on social networking sites making statuses about a particular thing (a movie release, sports game, court trial (hello, Casey Anthony), etc.), as if their status updates are any more enlightening or exciting. Seriously dudes, respect your friends enough to humor them when they’re excited or preoccupied with something. If you don’t, just defriend. And if you wouldn’t say it to someone’s face, don’t say it online.

Anyway.

It’s been great having Nicole here in Florida. We loved the movie. It was our fourth and final HP movie together. I’m trying to figure out a way to keep her here. Life is infinitely better with her around! We’ve been having fun, though I think I’ve probably gained 5,000 pounds in a week from all the good eating we’ve been doing. I didn’t think I’d make it through my workout today because I was so weighed down. Whew.

Nicole is currently upstate for a few days to see her parents, but when she comes back on Wednesday we have big plans to make homemade Butterbeer and we’ll probably see the movie for a third time before she goes back to California the following Wednesday. We’re also going to a friend’s wedding down South this coming weekend, so my posts may be slim until August, but don’t worry. I’ll be back. In the meantime you can study your copy of Hogwarts: A History.

The Best Thing I Ate This Week: Butterbeer Cupcakes!

This may come as a shock to you, but I fucking love Harry Potter.  I love Harry Potter so much, I flew 3,000 miles to go to a museum exhibit with props from the films and to see Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: Part 1 with my friend Nicole, who introduced me to the series.  I love Harry Potter so much, I once got kicked out of a gay night club after interrupting a drag show to tell a drag queen that I love Harry Potter.  Into her microphone.  Under a spotlight.  To my credit, I didn’t get kicked out for interrupting the show to talk about Harry Potter, I got kicked out for being a drunk straight girl at a gay club who was on the verge of possibly throwing up, but still.  My love for Harry Potter knows no bounds.

Naturally, I was STOKED when I found this recipe for Butterbeer Cupcakes on amybites.com.  We’re talking almost-lost-control-of-my-bladder excited.  I usually bookmark recipes I’m interested in trying sometime when I feel like baking or cooking something, but I had to make these IMMEDIATELY.

Accio cupcakes!

They were even more magical than I dreamed they would be.  They’re easily the best thing I ate this week.  They’re sweet, buttery, creamy, and the cake came out super light.  I always have a hard time making cupcakes from scratch because I feel like they come out really dense and muffin-y, but these little cakes were absolutely perfect!  I shared some with my best friend, Miranda, and I brought the rest to work.  Someone must have put a Disillusionment Charm on these, because I walked away for a little while and when I came back they were gone!  I even got a self-proclaimed cupcake naysayer to eat one and he claimed to (sort of) enjoy it.  Everyone else loved them and Miranda ate three in a row.

I may have had one or two myself.  And the batter?  OH, the batter.  That’s all I’m saying.

I suggest you fly your broom or apparate over to amybites and make these immediately.  Especially if your letter to Hogwarts got lost in the mail and you need to eat your feelings.

Wingardium Leviosa...into my mouth!

PWND by the PNW

My trip to the Pacific Northwest was great.  I got to spend five full days with my awesome friend Nicole, who I miss terribly since she moved to Los Angeles, I got to eat lots of good food, I got to see some other delightful friends, and I got to see snow for the first time!

Stoked.

It actually ended up snowing a lot more than in that picture.  It was a winter wonderland, according to Nicole. We were thrilled.

Here’s what happened: Nicole flew in from LA, I flew in from Orlando, we spent two days in Seattle visiting the Seattle Science Center to see the Harry Potter exhibit, seeing the new Harry Potter (!!!) movie at midnight, and hanging out with our friends Leigh and Matt, then we drove to Portland and spent two days there visiting the Japanese Gardens and kind of driving aimlessly around the city, then spent the last day driving from Portland to Seattle mountainside and we saw a shit ton of snow.  It was glorious.

Of course, the food wasn’t bad either.

Chocolatey delight from an awesome Swedish bakery

We were not actually impressed by these cupcakes. They were no Blue Bird Bake Shop cupcakes, that's for sure.

Best freaking breakfast, EVER!

Vegetarian Black Eyed Pea Fritters. I love fritters!

$10 mac n' cheese. Worth it.

Uh, don't worry, we shared.

We had a great time together, then got on our own separate planes to go home on Monday, but my connecting flight could not connect due to bad weather in St. Louis, so I got re-routed to Nashville and was put in a hotel for the night.  I didn’t make it home until yesterday afternoon and during the trip I came down with a nasty sinus infection that has just gotten worse since I got home.

I’ve spent the day in bed drinking Gatorade and eating Amy’s vegetable soup with Ritz crackers.  My head is pounding. I was supposed to drive down to South Florida for Thanksgiving tonight, but I’m going to stay home and head out tomorrow.  Gotta eat my Thanksgiving dinner.

I had a great time in the PNW, even though the weather totally pwnd me, and I’m looking forward to the holiday, but I kind of can’t wait to get back to my regular workouts and regular eating.  It can’t be a coincidence that my health went to shit when I took a short break from being so consistently awesome.

Hanging around in the snow probably didn't help either, huh?

Happy Thanksgiving to all!

Project Tasteless: The Naked Chef Challenge feat. Drag Queens, Harry Potter, and Why The Hell Not-Hot Buffalo Eggs Benedict

When Rachel announced Project Tasteless this week, I got stoked.  I’ve been needing some motivation to get back in the kitchen lately and I was really excited to try something new.   Challenge #1 is The Naked Chef challenge.  Since I don’t believe in wearing pants at home, this is a perfect starting point for me.  I racked my brain for a few hours (including the majority of a spin class) about what to make.  I knew I wanted to make a breakfast dish, because I can most often be found whipping up Sunday breakfast sans pants, because you know, who wears pants on Sunday?  I also thought about how delicious greasy breakfasts are when you’re drunk and/or hungover, which led me to think about how excited my friend Dustin gets about this Eggs Benedict dish that a local restaurant serves 24 hours a day.  We’ve been known to dine at said restaurant at 2 in the morning after dancing our little hearts out .  So, for The Naked Chef challenge, Dustin’s favorite Buffalo Eggs Benedict won.

First, a hypothetical story:

Hypothetically speaking, let’s say you had a group of awesome gay dudes who talked you into going to their favorite gay dance club one night, even though you’re not a dance club kind of girl.  Still hypothetically speaking, let’s say you ordered a margarita at said gay club, then another, then another.  And maybe one more.  Let’s also say, hypothetically of course, that the margaritas were doubles.  Strong, strong doubles.  Then let’s say that you got up during the nightly drag show and told the head drag queen that you love Harry Potter.  Let’s say you told the head drag queen you love Harry Potter into the microphone, in the spotlight, in front of a huge room full of hysterically laughing gay dudes and your friends, who did nothing to stop you from doing this.  Then let’s say you were walking kind of crooked and maybe looked like dumb, drunk asshole, so you got kicked out of the club.  Hypothetically.

But seriously, who DOESN'T love Harry Potter? Fucking losers, that's who.

This may or may not have happened to me.  No one can be sure.  What we are sure of, is that after any kind of night out, we like to go to the aforementioned restaurant right up the road from where I live that truly keeps the party going.  By day, this place is fairly standard; it’s called Bananas and they serve jazzed up versions of classic comfort foods.  By night, the menu remains the same, but the staff changes over from cleaned up hipsters to fabulous drag queens, who randomly break out into sing-a-long songs and bring you cotton candy with your checks.  It’s a good time for all.

Fun side note: when Bananas first opened, my friend Joey thought that it was a male wait staff version of Hooters.  It’s definitely not, but what a lucrative business idea!

Or not.

Source

One of the selling points of Bananas is that they serve breakfast all night long.  The food and the atmosphere totally beats Denny’s and there are choices for everyone.   As I mentioned, my fabulous friend Dustin loves the fuck out of that Buffalo Eggs Benedict, which I healthified and renamed Why The Hell N0t-Hot Buffalo Eggs Benedict, because really, why the hell not add buffalo sauce and bleu cheese to Eggs Benedict?

Now, I have to admit, I’m actually not a big fan of Eggs Benedict; I’d never order the dish for myself, but I know a lot of people REALLY love it, so I decided it was totally worth a try.  I had never made Eggs Benedict before, so I perused the Internet for recipes and ideas and ended up doing a bit of a healthier mashup of Alton Brown’s recipe and The Pioneer Woman’s recipe, sans ham, with buffalo sauce and bleu cheese, of course.  Dustin and I are both vegetarians, so when he orders the dish at Bananas, he obviously gets it without ham.  I nipped a bite of the Bananas EB the last time we went there together, so I had a good idea of what the outcome should be.

The outcome.

To make this dish for one, you’ll need:

2 whole eggs, 2 egg yolks

1 tbsp white vinegar

1 whole wheat English muffin, toasted

2 tbsp crumbled bleu cheese

5 tbsp butter, melted

2 tbsp Frank’s Red Hot Buffalo Sauce

1 tsp cayenne pepper

Salt, and pepper to taste

Optional:

Ham, Canadian bacon, vegetarian Canadian bacon (Yves makes it), or vegetarian bacon (I used Morningstar)

Fresh chives for garnish

To prepare eggs:

Bring a pot of water to boil and add the vinegar.  The vinegar will help keep the egg whites from separating.  Poach one egg at a time; I found it easier to crack the eggs in a separate bowl and tip the egg into the boiling water.  Poach for about 3-4 minutes, then use a slotted spoon to remove the egg onto a plate .  Poaching eggs is one of those things that really just needs practice.  I had to go through a few eggs before I got it right, since this was my first real attempt at poaching.

To prepare Buffalo hollandaise sauce:

Put egg yolks and cayenne in a blender and blend those suckers up.  Heat the butter in a small saucepan or be lazy like me and microwave it for about 45 seconds.  While blending the egg yolks at a high speed, SLOWLY add the butter in the little blender hole.  Really drizzle it slowly so the butter doesn’t cook the eggs.  When everything is emulsified and creamy, add the Frank’s Red Hot.  Taste the sauce and adjust the seasonings accordingly.

To plate:

Assemble the poached eggs on top of a split toasted whole wheat English muffin and drizzle the desired amount of hollandaise on top.  I used about two tablespoons; I did not use close to the amount of hollandaise that I made, so I wasn’t too concerned about all that butter.  Add crumbled bleu cheese on top of the eggs and salt and pepper to taste.  Add chopped chives to garnish.

This dish is spicy, creamy, and decadent, but it’s also a lot healthier than your typical EB, thanks to the whole wheat English muffin and the use of Frank’s instead of the standard fatty buffalo sauce.  Of course, if you go nuts on the hollandaise or the bleu cheese, you might have to do an extra 20 minutes on the treadmill, but sometimes that’s worth it, right?

Right.

And of course, I didn’t forget the other requirement of the Naked Chef challenge, Rachel.  Here I am in all my pantless glory!

Who needs pants when you have a polka dot apron?

Real Magic: Eating at The Wizarding World of Harry Potter

Yesterday I spent 8 full hours at Islands of Adventure in The Wizarding World of Harry Potter.  8 hours.  In the Florida sun.  8 hours.

And it was magical.

I’ve been a HP fan for a few years now; my good friend Nicole talked me into reading the books, and now I just feel sorry for anyone who doesn’t experience the magic.  As a writer and a generally imaginative person, I do have a tendency to love things that allow me to suspend my disbelief, but the Harry Potter series really blows other fantasy series out of the water for me.  I seriously love that shit.

STFU IOA. I LOVE YOU!

That being the case, I loved every second I spent inside The Wizarding World of Harry Potter and I’m thoroughly impressed with the meticulous level of attention to detail.  Non-readers could certainly enjoy the park for what it has to offer, but would definitely be missing out.  Every inch of the park really pays homage to the story, right down to the food.

People keep asking me about the butterbeer.  What does the butterbeer taste like?

Tastes like magic!

For real.  Butterbeer is delicious.  It tastes like magic, if magic tasted like cream soda with a touch of butterscotch, topped with whipped cream, which it does.  You can get butterbeer frozen or cold.  I definitely preferred the frozen–it’s like a Magic Slurpee! Also, someone told me that because we were in The Wizarding World of Harry Potter, where magic is real, butterbeer contains no calories.

I wish. That would be truly magical.

In addition to the delicious butterbeer, I also drank some Pumpkin Juice, the wizard breakfast juice of choice.  Pumpkin juice contains real pumpkin and apricot puree, apple juice, and spices, and has a really rich, robust fruity pumpkin flavor.  It does not contain high fructose corn syrup and is 81% real juice.  Not bad, IOA.

Double fisting butterbeer and pumpkin juice. You know how I roll.

We ate lunch at The Three Broomsticks, which boasted fresh roasted chicken, ribs, vegetables, corn, potatoes, and shepherd’s pie.  My two friends got big, beautiful plates of roasted chicken, crispy potatoes, and vegetable medleys. Nicole also had a chocolate trifle, which was as beautiful as it was delicious–I had a bite, of course!

Some kind of wonderful

Quite unfortunately, The Three Broomsticks wasn’t very vegetarian friendly, and I ended up eating the kid’s macaroni and cheese meal, which came with grapes and applesauce, and a crappy iceberg lettuce salad.  That was the only part of my day that wasn’t magical.  I’ll be writing a letter to IOA, in which I will argue a case for adding a vegetarian option and will offer suggestions.  I’m also going to work on whipping up a vegetarian shepherd’s pie this week, because now I have it in my head.  That all being said, The Three Broomsticks was still really cool.

Not pictured: Vegetarians

Between riding the Harry Potter and the Forbidden Journey ride (which, btw, IS THE BEST RIDE EVER) three times, drinking our butterbeers, and bopping all around Hogsmeade, we made sure to visit the Honeydukes candy store and Zonko’s joke shop.  Honeydukes was filled to the brim with sugary delights, including Ton Tongue Toffee, Sugar Quills, Dark Mark lollipops, Acid Pops, Peppermint Toads, Bertie Bott’s Every Flavour Beans (watch out for bogey-flavored ones!), and HUGE chocolate frogs.  Though I wanted everything, I limited myself to one chocolate frog, which is still sitting on my kitchen counter.

All in all, the park and the day were both amazing and I can’t wait to go back.  I spent today recovering and I hit Power Yoga, Abs Stretch, and a spin class to burn off those butterbeer calories.

EXPECTO PATRONUM!