I Owe it All to Body Pump

I’ll tell you what. The only thing worse than moving is moving when you’re out of shape. Luckily for me, the only pain I’m feeling from the eight hours of moving I did yesterday is on my poor feet, which succumbed to blisters caused by wearing tennis shoes for toooooo long. My muscles, while a bit fatigued, feel fine. I’m not sore, I can lift my arms above my head, and if I had to, I could do 100 squats right this second.

I owe it all to Body Pump.

Everyone knows moving is terrible and the worst part about it for me in the past was always the intense muscle pain I’d feel for several days after the move. Yesterday commenced my SIXTH move in Orlando, including my original move from Fort Lauderdale. Every time I’ve moved myself and every time I have felt the pain. Not this time, though. Even though it was just Dan and me doing all the heavy lifting, even though my wingspan was too short to safely pick up the couch, even though we had to make several trips, we did it and my muscles feel just fine. And this was after spending two days painting walls!

I think I often take for granted what working on my strength has done for my body. Of course I know that working out and lifting weights has made me stronger, but it’s not until I do something like move or paint or house-flip do I realize how much I’ve actually done for my body.

It’s a good thing for me to remember. These days I’ve been struggling with being appreciative of everything I’ve accomplished and the move was a good reminder of what I can physically do and how strong I really am, even though I don’t look it.

I still would have paid the $300 for movers though. It would have been worth it for the time saved, but Dan talked me out of it. I won’t be fooled next time.

The Real Reason You Should Get In Shape

Last night my boyfriend and I went to see Super 8. We both enjoyed the movie and I was glad that I hadn’t really read anything about it. I had no expectations whatsoever and I was pleased with the results. That being said, though I was engrossed in the story and the action for most of the film, one thing kept turning over and over in my mind:

If I was in this situation, would I be in good enough shape to run for miles without stopping and escape the monster?

Years ago when I first started watching LOST (another JJ Abrams production), I was not in nearly as good of shape as I am now, and I remember having a conversation with my best friend about how we would definitely both be dead if we had survived the plane crash and landed on the island.  I mean, come on, scaling huge island mountains, chasing down wild boar, escaping loose polar bears, and running from the Others, or worse, the Smoke Monster—there was no way I would have made it longer than a week. I just didn’t have the body strength for it.

But I think I do now.

"How did she escape my wrath?! She must have incredible endurance from all that spinning and Body Pump!"

Sometimes when I think about zombies (which is more often than you might think), I consider what my options would be and if I would be able to get myself and my cats to a safe shelter without having our brains eaten. If they were 28 Days Later zombies, I think my chances would be slim, because although I have some endurance, I don’t run very fast. But if they were Shaun of the Dead zombies, I think I could run fast enough to get away or swing a bat or other blunt object hard enough to kill a few zombies. I also think my body could take a bit of a beating from things like jumping over fences (which I think I could do in an extreme situation), rolling on the ground to avoid something swinging at me (ditto), and with enough adrenaline, I think I could kick pretty hard.

"Damn, she must work out. Look at her go!"

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The conclusion I’ve come up with is that everyone should get into shape if for no other reason than being able to survive a monster movie-esque attack on society. You never know when it could happen. You need to be ready to run, ready to fight, and ready to survive. All you have is the strength of your body and your wits! You’re really gambling if you’re relying on wits alone. Being in shape is essential for survival!

Unless you're far too lovable to die. Then things will just work themselves out.

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Next time you feel like skipping the gym or shying away from something you haven’t tried before, like a weight lifting class or a spinning session, think about what would happen if we were suddenly under attack and needed to run the fuck away or fight.  Just think about it.

"Should have gotten off the couch, slowpoke."

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The only time I feel like my wits would serve me better than my strength is in a situation with attractive vampires. As we all know, they’re way too fast to really escape them, but if you can intrigue or interest them enough, you might have a chance of living as a sex slave or an informant or something—at least for awhile.

There are worse fates in life.

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Ugly vampires always seem to be really stupid, so outrunning or outsmarting them might be viable options. I guess I’d need to test the theory.

At any rate, you better get in shape, and soon. Danger lurks around every corner.

Happy Gymniversary!

I did it!  I’ve been going to the gym consistently for a whole year!

A year ago, Chiara and I joined the Y and started going together and we’ve kept it up all year long.  I remember when we first went.  She talked me into trying Zumba, and I hated it with a fiery passion that consumed my soul.  I started spinning that week and I’ve gone consistently 2-4 times a week for the whole year.  I don’t even know how many miles I’ve logged!  Chiara and I tried out a bunch of different classes and found ones we both liked. She still goes to Zumba alone, and I still go to spinning alone, but we’ve logged many hours in Next Level, Power Yoga, and Boot Camp together. This is the longest either one of us has ever stuck with a gym program! We fucking rule.

Happy Gymniversay, Chi Chi!

P.S. Happy Gymniversary to our mysterious gym buddy who always wears the same clothes and is in every single gym class, who never seems to put any actual effort into the workouts.  We’re fascinated by you.  What makes you tick?

Working It Out: My Favorite Workouts

People constantly tell me that they hate gyms and that they don’t understand how I get the motivation to go work out almost every day and so consistently.  The first thing I tell them is that I don’t really have a choice–either I work it out, or I watch someone else eat a piece of blueberry pie and I turn into Violet Bearuregarde.

It's true.

The second thing I tell them is that for me to stay motivated and consistent, I had to find exercises I don’t absolutely loathe.  It took some trial and error–when I first joined the Y almost a year ago, I quickly discovered how much I hate doing anything that requires an ounce of rhythm (like Zumba), because I have none.  I get overly concerned with trying to do everything right, I can’t keep up, I get self-conscious, and I end up just looking like a drunk, messed up Oompa Loompa performing an Irish jig.

"What are you trying to say?"

During the trial and error process, I discovered that my favorite exercises are one that are well-structured in segments and that allow me to sit down sometimes.  Really!  The other day I realized that all of my favorite exercises have floor segments (or, in spinning, first position sitting) that take momentary bits of the load off.

Now, it’s not that I like exercises that allow me to sit down because I’m lazy–quite the contrary. I like the exercises that have floor or sitting segments because they’re always more strength-focused and as we all know by now (I hope), building strength is key for maintaining a healthy body weight.  Rachel’s post about how you must strength train, even if you are fat, is my favorite blog post that covers this issue.

Think about it–when you run on the treadmill, put in a 30 minute session on the elliptical, shake it in a Zumba class, or grind it in a hip hop dancing class, you’re pretty much doing pure cardio, which is great and it’s necessary, but you’re not really building much strength at all.  You’ll never find me in any dance-oriented cardio class because I just don’t have the rhythm (remember, drunk Oompa Loompa), and while I did a lot of treadmill running in preparation for my first 5k and will hop on the elliptical here and there, I’d much rather combine my cardio and strength or focus purely on strength in my workouts. 

These are the exercise classes I discovered work best for me:

1.  Spinning: Spinning seems to be one of those love-it-or-hate-it exercises.  It’s hard, it’s in the dark, you get drenched in sweat, the music is loud, and there’s usually an instructor yelling, so people tend to get intimidated by it the first time they go.  But it’s for all those reasons that I love spinning and why it works for me.  I love classroom environments, which is why I almost always go to classes instead of working out on my own.  I thrive when I have the ability to see how to do things correctly and I’m motivated by working out with other people.  Spinning is so structured and while it’s an amazing cardio blast, it also builds some serious strength in the legs and glutes. It is recommended that you try spinning at least three times before you decide you absolutely hate it.  I find that the instructor makes all the difference for me.  If I don’t like the instructor I usually have a really bad ride, so I only go to instructors I like.  Simple enough.  Spinning also helps keep me up to date with all of the popular music I wouldn’t otherwise know, which in turn helps me know what’s going on when I’m in gay dance clubs.

"Everybody take it off!"

It was ’80s night.  I don’t always rock a side ponytail, although I probably should.

2.  Les Mills Body Pump: Body Pump is a 60 minute barbell-based weight training class that challenges all of the major muscle groups in the body.  Before I started Body Pumping, I’d walk by the classes and think “I could never do that.”  I eventually got up the courage to give it a try and I loved it right away.  Body Pump is structured, challenging, and I GET TO LAY DOWN! Chest, triceps, and abs are mostly done on the back, and the class is structured to load up opposing muscle groups so that you can actually get through each exercise; that means after intense squatting with weight across the back, we lay on our backs and do chest presses.  I think it’s awesome.  What I really love about Body Pump is that I have someone to watch so I can constantly correct my form.  I also started seeing results within two weeks.  I took several inches off my arms from doing Body Pump, and my arms are one of my biggest problem areas.  I don’t think I ever would have started weight training without this class; I certainly never would have walked into that free weight room at the gym and started lifting by myself.  I would have had no idea what to do!  Now that I know what to do, I could do weights on my own, but again, I love the classroom environment, so Body Pump is for me.  I really wish my gym held other Les Mills classes because I’ve looked them all up and they all look amazing!

3.  Yoga/Power Yoga: Yoga is one of those things that is just really simply good for you and there are modifications for pretty much every pose, so even the most basic beginners should be able to do yoga and feel good afterward.  When I first started going to the gym, spinning and yoga were the only two classes I went to.  They both really helped me build my weak little muscles into muscles that could take on heavier work, like Body Pump.  I kind of fell out of yoga for awhile because I got so focused on doing “harder” things, but I missed it and went back at the beginning of this year, then I wondered why I ever stopped going.  After my 5k last month I prevented shin splints by going to yoga after the race.  When I’m aching from one of the “harder” classes, yoga helps heal my muscles immediately–better and more quickly than a day off from exercising.  Yoga has also helped me with my balance (I’m not known for my gracefulness) and it’s helped me deal with my stress better.  Power Yoga is just a faster version of yoga.  I enjoy both.

Gentlemen also enjoy yoga. This position is called "plow." No joke.

4.  Interval/Circuit Training (Next Level): At my gym, this class is called Next Level because it really does bring you to the next level of fitness.  It’s 30 minutes of interval training.  There are usually four stations, two exercises per station, 30 seconds on, 10 seconds off and we go around the circuit twice.  Sometimes that switches up a little bit–yesterday the trainer made us do each exercise four times instead of two on the second round–but it’s generally 4-2-2.  I sweat more in Next Level than I do in all of my other classes combined.  It combines cardio and strength and it’s just so efficient.  I love efficiency, and of course, I love the structure.  There are new exercises every time–we do things like mountain climbers (ugh), jumpsquats, and high steps, we use kettleballs, weights, TRX, weighted balls (hehehe), and sometimes we even use sandbags.  There’s always something different and some new different muscle aches the day after every Next Level session I put in, which is a good thing.  If your gym has any kind of interval/circuit training and you’re looking to really push yourself or get out of a plateau, give it a try.  You’ll definitely see results quickly.

5.  Cardio Strength: I don’t always love this class–this is another one that really depends on the instructor.  As you might expect, Cardio Strength combines cardio and strength, much like Next Level, but you stay stationed in one spot for the most part and the class is usually 45 minutes to an hour.  I prefer the efficiency of Next Level, but there are days when Cardio Strength is in a better time slot for me.  It’s like a longer, yet lesser version of Next Level, but it certainly burns calories and builds strength, so when I have to, I go.

6.  Pilates: When I first started going to the gym I tried to go to pilates a few times and it just felt so hard.  I guess now that I’ve built up so much strength I’m able to appreciate it more, because I just started going again and I’m enjoying it so much more than I did the first time around.  Pilates focuses on using core muscles to work on strength and flexibility.  It’s mostly done on the floor, on a yoga mat, and it’s another one that puts those little often-ignored muscles to work.

So, those are the main workouts that I do in the gym.  I also try to fit in brisk walks when I can.  I run when I’m 5k training.  The classes, though, have changed the way I view going to the gym. I really think it’s just a matter of finding what you like.  My workout buddy, Chiara, hates spinning and loves Zumba.  Of course, she naturally has rhythm and never looks like a drunk Oompa Loompa when she does those dance workouts.

If you find the thought of running on a treadmill or plugging away mindlessly on an elliptical or recumbent bike absolutely depressing (which I do), please give classes a try.  There are gyms with reasonable rates (or you may be able to get a discount through your workplace) and there are yoga studios everywhere that offer reasonable packages.  The group setting tends to be really helpful and after awhile you start recognizing people.  You might even make some friends!

Or, you know, you can just make like Augustus Gloop and throw yourself into a river of chocolate to test out your swimming skills.  Good luck with that.

"Whoops."-Augustus Gloop